Amphigouri: varnished nonsense

I decided there absolutely had to be an entry today, if only so I can say that more than 1/5 of the days in January had entries. That hasn’t happened since the first month I started this site. See, I’m actually working on my resolutions (ok, so I haven’t reached the “much” in resolution #1 - let’s not nit-pick just yet)!

This week has been something of a long one. Husband has been out of town since Monday morning, the longest stretch of time we’ve been apart since our wedding. Funny how the sounds of four cats tearing through the house and making the typical cat-type noises take on very different - rather ominous - tones when I know I’m the only one home at night. Glad he comes back this evening, I miss him.

I did manage to get my application to Drexel’s Online MLS program in the mail this week. Yay, me! The most annoying part of the process was rewriting my resumé which hadn’t been touched in two years. I managed to add information about my current role and strip out the extraneous bits from previous jobs in order to get the whole thing onto two pages, but can I just say how much I HATE MSWord and the resumé templates?? Yuck. I ended up creating my own from scratch. At least it’s done. I need to find better software for this (I need to reinstall teTeX binaries on my Sun workstation, actually. Then I need to relearn how to use it; the syntax, if I recall, is rather ugly, but used properly it’s a powerful tool)

I’ve also been trying to upgrade my Mac this week. Actually, I think I might have started the process last weekend - it’s not going overly well. I have a lovely blue&white G3 that I bought back in ‘99 when I thought that certainly 6G of hard drive space would be enough. Hah! Little did I know. The real object I lust after is the new 17-inch powerbook, but since the cost for that is roughly the same as the cost to have the electric system in our house upgraded or to have the back yard regraded so the water doesn’t run down the slope to pool at our foundation, I’m settling for a new 40G hard drive and an OS upgrade to OS X - Jaguar. Seems that there are slight incompatibilities with new stuff and my ol’ G3 (the details of which I won’t get into)… with luck this weekend’s attempts will fix everything and I’ll once again have a nice working Mac at home.

On a more upbeat note, my order from Despair Inc. arrived yesterday. Two frames to display at work: Burnout and Cluelessness, plus a calendar for Husband and one for myself. I’m amused.

Right. Enough of the boring ramblings. Off to get the house cleaned before Husband arrives!

I have to admit, much(most?) of my news intake comes from our local NPR station, WBUR, while I’m on my morning and evening commutes. I far prefer this medium, as there’s much less sensationalism (no bits about woman-who-accidentally-backed-over-own-child-with-riding-mower, or any other gory or freakish tales of woe that you know are just in there to boost ratings; Husband and I have stopped watching many of the local TV news reports for this reason). Plus, I like the commentary.

This morning’s commentary (by Pat Morrison) was particularly wonderful. Mis-User Tax. Check out Today’s Morning Edition for the audio. The description:

A section of this completely validated my feelings of annoyance toward the recent State of the Union address (I won’t get into any of my political views, just this one nit-picky peeve).

Now, I don’t claim to have a particularly large vocabulary or be terribly well-versed in nuances of the English language (sorry, Dad), but I thought I knew how one is to pronounce the word “nuclear.”. I caught the first half or so of the SotU, and could have sworn I heard POTUS say “nucular.” Multiple times. Erm. Well, maybe I misheard. Or, could it be that I didn’t know that there was an alternate, acceptible, pronunciation (yeah, so I scored higher than I should have on recent verbal GRE scores [*preen*] - that just proves that I studied a bit about how to guess accurately when one doesn’t know what the heck the words mean, which was most definitely the case for me. [Thank you, Kaplan CD!] I still have significant doubts when it comes to my spelling and vocabulary.) ?

Ha, no! Indeed, he was mispronouncing “nuclear” - and Morrison suggests a fine of $1k per flub (hah! again!). (pull-quotes available later, as soon as I can get my grubby little hands on the transcript)
[update: 31Jan]

Had I gone directly to the dictionary I would have also found my answer:

Usage Note: The pronunciation (nky-lr), which is generally considered incorrect, is an example of how a familiar phonological pattern can influence an unfamiliar one. The usual pronunciation of the final two syllables of this word is (-kl-r), but this sequence of sounds is rare in English. Much more common is the similar sequence (-ky-lr), which occurs in words like particular, circular, spectacular, and in many scientific words like molecular, ocular, and vascular.

So, if Bush isn’t up on his pronounciations, why the heck didn’t someone on his staff correct him before the public address ??

Bah. Bartlet wouldn’t have made that mistake. (aside: Husband suggested, after listening to a speech a month or two ago, that Presidential candidate John Kerry has the same sort of speech patterns that Pres. Bartlet does on West Wing. Smart strategy, if intentional.)

Ok, I lied. I am going to get into another issue I have over the SotU address. From the transcript:

This made me snort. Historic education reform, perhaps - if by reform you mean “decrease funding so some schools (Portland, OR) need to cut back on the length of the school year or other school systems (this one in Indiana, but I’ve heard of many elsewhere, including ME and MA) must raise taxes or lay off teachers.”

How the heck is there supposed to be any education reform, something that’s presumably meant to provide a better education to more students, when state budgets are such that quality teachers have to be let go, class sizes are overly large (40 kids in English?!?!), or taxpayers are asked/required to hand over more money??

Color me OUTRAGED.

So, this wasn’t what I had intended to write about today, but the absurdity of the situation necessitates more publicity (even what little publicity this site gives it).

I thought I’d seen the height of ridiculousness when last year I read about British Telecommunications’ patent suit against Prodigy. From an older news article (infoworld, 2000):

The suit was dismissed, as it should have been. Interesting to note is this comment by “Prodigy and SBC spokesperson Larry Meyer”:

What makes this comment particularly interesting is the latest patent infringement claim: SBC Communications is claiming patent rights on icon-based navigation. They are trying to convince MuseumTour.com to acquire a license to the SBC patent
. From the letter SBC sent to museumtour.com:

Odd that SBC (parent company of Prodigy) apparently feels that this current issue isn’t frivolous.
As PlaybackTime mentions:

Bah. Silly silly sots. Ludicrous patent, ludicrous claims.

Random tidbits from a couple of the finer media sources available:

Heard about this on WBUR last night as I was on my way home from work:

The Lysistrata Project

From the website:

Hopefully a few more towns in the Boston area will put on productions, as I want to go.

Last night we saw the last portion of a PBS show, Fred Friendly Seminars. Specifically, it was the program on Making Better Babies: Genetics & Reproduction:

What little I caught was really very thought-provoking, and even Husband made the (unsolicited!) comment that it was an interesting show. We haven’t yet decided if we are going to have children ourselves (definitely not in the next couple of years); if we do decide to procreate, I’ll be near or in the age range of women for whom amniocentesis is traditionally recommended (35+). A couple issues that were raised in the part of the program we saw were surrounding the decision to have this test, and what to do with the information a successful test provides (”The test can detect chromosomal disorders — such as Down’s syndrome, structural defects — such as spina bifida (open spine, where the vertebrae fail to close), anencephaly (a condition in which the brain is incomplete or missing), and many rare, inherited metabolic disorders.”). Obviously many discussions would need to be held in order to decide if risks outweigh benefits of the test (sounds like they probably do); my gut feeling is that we’d have the tests. A much more weighty issue to wrangle over is what we’d do if the tests indicated “Problems” with our fetus. How on earth do parents-to-be make these decisions, particularly if the results aren’t 100% conclusive (e.g. “there’s a 75% chance of a disorder”) ?? Listening to some of the panelists talk about various scenarios, and in one case about a very personal real experience, I was bowled over with anxiety. How do people even dare to *try* to have children when some of the risks are so high, let alone make a decision whether to abort or not once pregnant and the test results have returned?
My mind boggles; obviously my Biological Time Bomb hasn’t yet been ticking loud enough for me to take much notice - if it had been, I suspect some of my anxiety would be far overshadowed by the desire to have children of our own (or so I’ve been led to believe, at any rate. ).

Additional tidbits included talk of cloning, and (as indicated by the title of the show), “Making Better Babies.” All-in-all, highly intellectually stimulating (did I just say that about a TV show?). I’m making a note to catch the next in the series, Genes on Trial: Genetics, Behavior, & the Law.

… the way Customer Service should be.

In earlier posts I have briefly mentioned Cross Jewelers. Cross is a small jewelry store in downtown Portland, Maine, with a very good reputation.
Over the last couple of years, I’ve had the absolute pleasure of dealing with them, and have come to see precisely why they have the reputation they do.

Husband bought my engagement ring from them. I happened to be with him on one or two shopping excursions, and was terribly impressed. Unlike in several other stores I’d seen, the staff didn’t hawk over us, and there was absolutely no pressure to purchase. Questions were answered thoroughly and thoughtfully, with no airs. It was about as comfortable an experience as one could hope to have.

Also in an earlier post, I mentioned that Brother J has been shopping around for a Ring. One of the stores on his list to visit was Cross, and I happened to be with him on the evening of his first visit (I was having my own ring resized to fit my right hand). I was bowled over by the experience. We were probably there close to two hours (they locked the doors behind us when we finally left), and an absolutely amazing staff member, Andrew Green, spent 90 minutes of that time with my brother (with me hovering about, once my own business had been finished). Andrew listened to Brother J describe the styles he had in mind, then pointed out a number of rings they had that matched the descriptions. He answered questions about the stones (my brother had done a fair bit of homework on diamonds so his questions covered more than just information about clarity, cut, etc.), and was very good about describing the pros and cons of various settings. The most exceptional thing, in my mind, was how obvious it was that Andrew is someone who absolutely loves his work. He was enthusiastic without being annoyingly fanatical; he knew the details about all the jewelry inside and out and the enjoyment he took from sharing this information with prospective customers was clear; he even mentioned to us how much he truly loves what he does, and he’s been in that business for 20+ years (if I recall correctly). He was *genuinely* personable, which was a refreshing change from so many salespeople I’ve dealt with who ooze insincerity from nearly every pore.

Ok, so perhaps I appear to be gushing overly much. However, I can’t recall the last time I’ve had such a fine customer experience as we’ve had at Cross Jewelers. Staff members there truly exemplify the way customer service should be.

Bad Idea #387:

It is a Bad Idea to install shelving in the bathroom.

Now, you may think to yourself “but this falls under the Good Idea category, doesn’t it? Shelving in the bathroom can’t be a bad thing.”

Perhaps. But, Dear Reader, you have not considered the following:

• The shelving installed on the wall next to the toilet, placed above and ever-so-slightly to the left of the commode.
• A house full of cats, one of which is a particularly good leaper.
• The commode, configured with a tank that happens to provide the perfect platform for leaping.
• The leaping cat, who happens to have a Sensitive Stomach.
• The leaping cat with the Sensitive Stomach, who also has a proclivity for Vulching (defined as climbing to great heights, crouching at the edge, and glaring down upon anyone and anything below).
• The fact that cats, particularly Leaping, Vulching ones with Sensitive Stomachs, rarely have the ability or the consideration to select appropriate times to be ill.

In light of these facts, mixed with a little bit of imagination, hopefully, Dear Reader, you can understand how Installing Shelving in the Bathroom is, indeed, a Bad Idea.

If not, just ask Husband for the full explanation.

Happy New Year!

I’m horrible at making and keeping New Year’s Resolutions. Primarily keeping.

I always start with the best of intentions (we all know where those lead), and usually make it through a few months of on-again, off-again work towards my goals. Then the downward spiral; I enter that final off-again slump that doesn’t end until early January of the following year, when the whole process begins once more. It’s not as though I select a ridiculous number of Resolutions to tackle, or that I choose the impossible to undertake; I think I just eventually slide back into the path of least resistance and lack the willpower to pull myself out and *stay* out.

Hopefully, this year will be different.

I’m (currently) only tracking a handful or two of items, most of which, on the surface, are sufficiently vague enough to allow multiple interpretations of success yet also allow for measurable results. The details under each resolution either break the goal into several mini-resolutions or describe how to measure progress and are, of course, subject to change (which is why I’m refusing to post those details here).

Resolutions for 2003

1. Update amphigouri much more regularly.
2. Exercise regularly. (ugh. though note the intentional vagueness of “regularly” - “hey, i exercised regularly - once every 3 months!” )
3. Apply to grad school. (easy one, as I’m almost done already!)
4. Continually strive for balance between work, school, & home. Keep Priorities in perspective.
   (of course, this assumes acceptance into grad school. The difficulty with the balance part is to not let myself feel guilty for not working [and not wanting to work] 12+ hours a day)
5. Purchase, Install, Configure financial software to keep better track of our debt, retirement funds, etc.
6. Work with Husband to make significant improvements to The House (the details on this one are going to be ever-changing, and span several rooms as well as sections of our yard. sigh.)
7. Start planning for future move to Maine (5-10 years) (and by “planning” I mean something more solid than the idle wishing/dreaming out loud that we’ve done in the past)
8. Cook more!

Actually, when I get going, I can think of several others (like, “Get Camera Fixed!”), but these are the primary ones with which I want to occupy my time over the course of the next 11.5 months. Wish me luck! Perhaps in coming weeks I’ll create categories here to track the progress of each Resolution so my readers (all three of you!) can start kicking my arse when I start slacking off.